Do You Feel Social Pressure? It is Time to Revolt

You often meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it - unknown. 

(5 min read)

I was speaking to a member of our community last week. She said something I hear all too often:  “I feel like I’m always behind. Like I’m running to catch up to a life that keeps running away.”

She told me how even on her day off, she couldn’t sit still. There was always list in her head. Things she should be doing. She was always planning something for her kids, then her husband, her family, and then in the end, some planning for herself.

She had all these deadlines in her mind, which she believed she had to keep. “It’s like if I stop, something terrible will happen.”

We all have this tendency to work under some unknown, unspoken urgency.

For those of us who have 9-5 jobs, there is the urgency of the boss, of the project, or the promotion.

If one deadline is missed, you will be passed up for a promotion in favor of your colleague.

But the truth is, all of this urgency is mind-made.

We create it in order to avoid looking at the messy parts of ourselves.

Slow is deep. Fast is shallow.

Your speed doesn’t matter if you’re just spinning in circles or headed the wrong way.

If you are not supposed to be working that painful job, working hard over there is indeed a waste of your time.

All speed is born from socially imposed urgency—and all such urgency is false.

We’ve been conditioned to fear stillness by society, that keeps doing everything to run away from itself.

We fear stillness so much, that we create our own urgency if we do not perceive it from someone else.

We have trained ourselves to respect made-up urgencies and obey imaginary deadlines, in the hopes of avoiding facing our inner emptiness.

But emptiness doesn't go anywhere.

It is waiting for you to get old, then it will confront you, because you avoided confronting it for so long.

Revolt Against Pressure

So what if you miss a deadline?

So what if you get berated, insulted, criticized, or punished?

So what if you lose your job?

You are not here to live in pressure and fear.

You have one life, and if you want to waste that entire life living under somebody's thumb, that's a choice that you have made.

You can self-victimize all you want, but at the end of the day, it's your life, and you are responsible for getting yourself out of this mess, regardless of who put you in it.


Remember, when you are 90, most people for whom you sacrificed yourself so much will be dead. And those who live, would not remember what the fuss is all about.

You can rest assured, that the people who conditioned you to live in fear are not coming to rescue you.

Your best friends are not coming. Your partner may try, but they also can't walk all the way with you.

It is all on you!

Note: We are obviously not recommending suddenly resigning from a well paying, slightly annoying job, for we all have bills to pay. But we can certainly drop that fear we live in. Come to think of it, being fearless at work, is exactly what they consider to be "leadership". (I'll save my thoughts on that bogus idea for another day)

Personally, I would rather starve and be fearless than live in the false comfort of fear.

To me, my freedom is a cost I find myself unable to pay.

I would rather reject rules and deadlines, and make others angry, than blindly accept them and make myself resentful.

Just because "everybody lives this way", doesn't make it right. It makes everybody wrong.

When you fiercely reject outside pressure, your strength and clarity of mind returns to you.

And you reject that pressure by choosing your own speed!

You reject it by slowing down, as much as you want, and let the world adjust.

Anxiety and Speed

Anxiety and fear cannot enter a mind that refuses to speed up.

And they cannot leave a mind that refuses to slow down.

Try this: The next time you think, speak, or act—go just 10% slower.

Watch what happens.

You’ll start to find flow.

Doing will become a happening. Effort will dissolve. Results will multiply.

This is the path of relaxed focus— Where your mind is present and slow, doing only what wants to happen. Never rushing. Never lagging. Always in the moment.

This is the true path to integrity, wholeness, and strength.

3 Actions to Embody This Shift

• Pause Before Responding
  Create a small space between the stimulus and your response. Ex: A phone rings, a text arrives, and you don't act right away.
  Reflection: What changes when I respond slowly, and not from speed?

   

• Walk Slowly for 5 Minutes Today
  Bring full awareness to each step. No phone, no music. Just presence.
  Reflection: What does the world look like when I’m not rushing through it?

   

• Say No to One False Urgency
  Notice one pressure you usually react to, and consciously say No to it.
  Reflection: What happens when I stop obeying urgency? Clue: Absolutely nothing!